Encouraging one
Photo above (left to right): my dad (Pastor Gabe), me, Shamier, Tony Jr., Shamier’s dad (Pastor Tony), and our siblings below.
en·cour·ag·ing
adjective
giving someone support or confidence; supportive.
positive and giving hope for future success; promising.
“We’ll have two margaritas. Make mine straight up and hers will be virgin,” I tell the waiter who looks like a young version of my dad. Years of severe migraines have forced Shamier to give up a lot of simple pleasures. Drinks arrive. We raise our glasses to cheers our reunion at this random Mexican joint in our hometown. **Clink!** We both don’t live in Peoria, IL anymore, but when the stars align we meet to eat. It’s always so good to be together.
Shamier is my childhood best friend. She’s more than that though; she’s my blood. The older, wiser sister I’ve always needed. It’s true we don’t live close anymore and I’m a terrible long-distance friend, but our history, loyalty and faithful checking in over the years keeps us hand in hand 35 + years later.
“Shamier! I’m just so proud of her (referring to my two-year-old). She’s so smart… I mean she’s so smart…” I share some random examples of my two-year-old’s impressive level of intelligence. “I mean, where did all her smarts come from? I mean, probably Caleb….” Shamier stops me. “Sarah. You know why she’s so smart. She’s smart because you’re smart. That’s your baby girl. You’re doing a great job raising her… Your mom would be so proud of you.” I pursed my lips, hard. Tears started flowing out of my eyes quickly. I didn’t want to make a scene as our tacos get dropped off. I could have easily sobbed in her arms right there and then. “Need anything else?” our waiter asked. “No, no. Thank you.” said Shamier. She continued to affirm and encourage me as a mother. The moment was deeply meaningful to me. Several things happened in that moment and I’ll try to explain them in brief…
Knowing: I felt known. Shamier knows me. I have deep insecurities about my intelligence. She knows the history of that wounding and was there by my side as I struggled academically in my youth. Shamier has always been so kind and gracious to me; one of the most faithful and loyal friends, loving me just as I am.
Reminding: Shamier reminded me of who I really am. In this Christian life we continuously need to be reminded of who we really are. We are fearfully and wonderfully made. Even with a master’s degree under my belt at times I still feel so small, but friends like Shamier remind me of the truth of who I really am.
Encouraging: I think it hit me in that moment just how much I’ve been needing some encouragement. I’ve been missing my mom, and Shirl-the-Pearl (one of her nicknames) was so good at verbally encouraging people, out loud, to their faces, on the regular. Since she’s been gone, I hadn’t realized just how much I’ve missed that. I think especially as a young mom I need the encouragement more than ever. Because being a mom is great but it is hard work and I’m surprisingly insecure about raising a human.
Father God I ask that you would remind of us of the Gospel. Wash us in your Word and the Truth of who you are and who we are because of you. Holy Spirit, encourage our hearts today.
Jesus, I ask that you would give us opportunities to encourage one another today. Let your people be known as encouragers. Let me not be inward facing. God, shut down the pity-parties and playing the victim. Let my heart be pure in the encouraging work of your Holy Spirit that people would know just how powerful and intimate your love really is.