Hosting: Beg, borrow and steal
Just kidding, don't steal stuff. Begging comes off kinda desperate, so let’s just go with borrowing!
Borrow when you can, friends. Don’t let pride or comparison ruin your desire to host. If you don’t own something outright, there is no shame in asking to borrow a thing. Do you need more folding chairs? Ask someone you know who has extra. Don’t own a Crockpot? I know a lot of people who do. Pride, fear and comparison divide and ruin Christian fellowship. Don’t allow the Devil to stop what the Lord has put on your heart to host.
I love hosting. And even more, I love hosting something a little more special for women. Guys typically don’t give a hoot about place cards or flowers on the table, but man I love those little details. I think women especially appreciate a “little extra” when it comes to hosting. It makes my heart so happy to make something a little nicer than the day-to-day table setting, especially for women who don’t often get to be served. What an honor. But let’s be honest, it can be a lot of work. Hosting can seem daunting if we think we don’t have all the “right” things; not enough cups, or chairs, or serving bowls, etc. I’ll say it again, if you don’t own something, there is no shame in simply asking to borrow a thing for a brief amount of time. I think it’s a real testimony to the goodness of the Lord when believers are generous in our sharing amongst each other. What can you give? What can you offer?
I hosted a breakfast recently and realized I didn’t have enough matching glasses AND I forgot that I donated my teacups and saucers years ago (WHAT-WAS-I-THINKING?!). There were actually a number of things I realized I didn’t have since we’ve transitioned into a more minimalist way of living. I just don’t have as much quantity as I used to or special event items. I’ve just learned to host without, which typically works really well for us. It would have been just fine to serve mismatched cups - NOT a big deal. But my goal was to really treat these women and setting a fully realized table was in my vision. I knew I wanted water glasses, tea cups and saucers, and a glass for special drinks like juice, or whatever. The list kept getting longer and longer the more I thought about what I wanted on the table. There was a moment when I thought, “l could just go buy those items…” But when I thought about the cost of all those things, I just knew we couldn’t afford it at this time. Thankfully I remembered that my neighbor had a lot of matching water glasses! And that my mother-in-law happened to have just the right amount of teacups and saucers for my guest list. And a funny side story: Before walking into a thrift shop a week before this event, I asked God, “Can you give me a set of matching napkins for larger gatherings?” Ones to match the set that I already have would be amazing.” AND HE DID! My eyes popped out of my head when I saw them just waiting for me. Brand-new-matching-cloth napkins!
The Lord cares about the details. Even when you set a table. He is in the details. I think about that, especially in the Springtime. When I get on the ground outside playing with my little gal, I see new grass coming in. Each blade the Lord has made comes up out of the mud for such a time as this. Each bud on my lilac bush he is calling to bloom, for beauty, for enjoying, for cutting and giving to those who are grieving and celebrating. He has a purpose in everything. Each name card on the table is a sweet reminder that you have a seat, not just at my table but at the Lord’s table. It’s a small picture of what’s to come. The Lord himself is preparing a place for us. It is so right and good that we practice preparing a place for our friends and even our enemies. It sounds silly, but it meant so much that the Lord answered my request for those cloth napkins. He knows I love those because that’s what I grew up with in my parents’ home. The Lord knows me. He knows what I like. And the Lord knows you and what you like.
If hosting is on your heart but you feel like you don’t have the “right stuff,” humble yourself and ask someone for their help. And don’t forget to ask the Lord if you have need. It is not silly or stupid or vain to ask God for material things. Everything has a purpose in God’s kingdom. Lastly, I don’t know about you, but I have to remind myself that it is going to take years, even decades to make our house a home. I want to grow in patience and contentment in hosting and homemaking. I have to reject the images and influencers portrayed on social media platforms and rest in what the Lord has blessed me with today. The truth is, I have more than enough.
Prayer: Lord, bless us home makers, hostesses, party-people and friends alike to be servant minded, like Christ. Jesus, teach us of your humility, your thoughtfulness and your love. Build your kingdom in our very living rooms, kitchens and backyards. Amen.
Some New Ideas
Ask your neighbors to borrow items so that you can grow in relationship with them.
If you already have many hosting items (water dispenser, candle votives, matching serving dishes, etc.), make some kind of announcement in your church or bible study inviting others to use what you have. Or share the news simply by word of mouth.
Start a “Hosting Library” from your own basement OR as a part of a church ministry. Invite people to donate unused serving ware, season decorations, unwanted glasses or grapefruit spoons. Use an honor system or keep a ledger to document the details.
If money is tight but you want to increase your hosting and serving inventory, the spring is a great time to create a garage sale/thrifting list. Even share that list or excel sheet with a friend so they can keep an eye out for those hidden treasures.
Oftentimes churches lend and/or rent long tables and chairs. See if your church can offer this service, too, especially when hosting bigger gatherings.
If you know someone who loves to host but does not have “all the things,” add to their collection with what you don’t use anymore OR…
Hosting Swap Party: Similar to a “Clothing Swap Party,” have everyone bring unwanted, gently used housewares and hosting items to swap. This can be as formal or as casual as you want. I’ve been to similar parties in the past where we turn it into an all morning affair with a continental breakfast and mimosas - really fun! All items that are not taken are donated.
Happy Hosting!
Love,
Sarah