The gift of knowing

Knowing : (adjective) 1. Showing or suggesting that one has knowledge or awareness that is secret or known to only a few people. 2. Done in full awareness or consciousness.

A memory…

It was a Sunday morning. It was hard to get out of bed let alone get ready for church. You know when you cry so hard the night before, right up until the point of falling asleep and then you just wake up crying all over again? It was that feeling. A new church where I hardly knew a soul and no one knew my family was the last place I wanted to be. But my husband gently led us there because he knew I needed to get up and move.

We drove to church on a beautiful fall day, much like today is: crisp, crunchy and bright. The sun was shining so bright. My spirit lifted by that light. “Thank you God for the sun” is the only good thing I could think on that car ride. We parked. We walked into the foyer of the church. I was biting my lip, tears on the edge of my eye lids and I prayed that no one would greet me so I wouldn’t have to pretend to be happy, because I knew that I wouldn’t be able to.

Then I saw him. A tall, handsome, African American man with gray hair and glasses was walking towards me. He looked at me with a knowing look. He scretched out his arms to embrace me and I just fell into that embrace. Without saying a word I knew that he knew what I was feeling. The moment was brief but deeply meanful; the feeling of being known, accepted and free to be me: a woman in grief. He said, “I’m so sorry about your mom.” A moment passed. “Did you know that I knew your mom?” he asked. My heart skipped a beat.

My mom had passed away only a few weeks before. She “lost the battle against cancer,” as they say. The grief so raw, but this man, Don Lusk knew that grief. I knew that Don had been married and lost his first wife to cancer. What’s worse is that he lost his second wife to cancer as well. Of all the people in church that Sunday, I’m so grateful it was Don who embraced me. What is an even sweeter blessing is that he knew my mom (They were both in the same profession and shared a deep love for music and God’s church). The only way that I can describe that moment is that I felt known. Grieving is such a lonely process, so when you meet face-to-face with someone who knows that specific grief, it means so much.

The business of living and breathing and having our being, it’s actually a very singular and often a lonely existence. But our Lord is Emmanuel. He is, ‘God with us’! (Hallelujah!). He is with us even at this very moment and He knows us implicitly. How quickly we forget this truth when circumstances are hard. Let us not forget, even in a pandemic and political and social unrest that we have the opportunity as the church to come together and remind each other that this is the Truth! (That’s big “T” truth my friends!): You are not alone. I see you and I understand what you are going through. Even better, JESUS is with you, He sees you and He knows you better than anyone else.

- GOD, let this Truth sink deep into our bones that you know us and love us -

Let us continue to share the gift of knowing with others. Even looking for opportunities to reach out to someone who is walking through something difficult, or even joyful, and bear with them, cry with them or celebrate with them. Let the church arise and shine as a people who love so well because we know how much Jesus loves us. *Cue the Gospel*

Thank you, Don Lusk.

I will never forget your kindness to me on that day.